Pickup lines that failed miserably!

  • Thread starter Thread starter Auriflex
  • Start date Start date
Once in a bar me and a friend had a bet who's gonna get slapped in the face by a chick first. I lost... The friend just went over to a chick and said: "may I beat your cunt with a billet?"

After the initial shock he got slapped, so I guess that was a poor pickup line.
 
Here is a few sure fire smacks upside your head!

1. Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here!

2. Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go fuck.

3. Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.

4. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

5. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock.

6. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

7. That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you I'd be coming, too.

8. I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.

9. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.

10. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big-Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

11. Wanna play house? You be the screen door and I'll bang you all night long.

12. If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

13. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille nametag.

14. If you were a car, I would wax you and ride you all over town.

15. Excuse me, do you wanna fuck, or should I apologize.

16. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

17. Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?

18. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.

19. You be the tree, and I'll wrap you like a Koala.

20. Hi my name is __. Remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night long.

21. I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

22. Want to play conductor? You be the engineer and I'll go choo choo.

23. You must be Jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.

24. The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.

25. Hi, my name is Skippy, like the peanut butter -- I stick to the roof of your mouth.

26. Hi, my name is Pogo, want to jump on my stick?
 
I got the F the C and the K, all i need is U <!--emo&GG--><img src="http://musclechemistry.mantisforums.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/bigsmile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt='GG'><!--endemo-->
 
ok it's your birthday.. walk up to some chick that you know and want to hit.. tell her that it's your b-day and after she gives you a kiss on the cheek.. point down at your zipper and say" IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY TOO." works everytime
 
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